To figure out the ways to make someone fall in love with you, it seems important to understand why we fall in love. But, the truth is that everyone seems to fall in love for very different reasons. One person may see someone sitting on a bus and fall in love with them while another person may need months to get to know someone before they start to fall in love with them. And to make it worse, science is showing that there are very superficial things that determine whether someone is going to fall in love with you or not.
For instance, science has shown that having a symmetrical face can make someone want you within a second of seeing you. This is an instinctual thing because people are drawn to good looks for a weird reason. They think good looking people are going to create some great looking kids! Even if you don’t want kids, this instinct is part of you and will still cause you to judge a person based on your biological preferences.
Other things you can’t control without some effort is where you live, where you work, and your genes. Research has shown that all of these things play a part in making someone fall in love with you.
So for this article, when we say ‘falling in love’, we mean moving past the attraction and hormonal stage and winning someone over in a way that makes them think, “I want to spend the rest of my life with that person.” This could also mean winning someone over even if they have not found you attractive to this point. If you can make them see themselves spending their life with you, then you can make them fall in love with you.
So what can you do to make someone fall in love with you? Following are 15 things you can try.
1. Put Other People First
Everyone wants to spend their life with someone who is kind and loving. We all want to have that one person who makes us feel important. And we are all drawn to people who do good in this world.
If you are someone who has a giving attitude, then you have a good shot of making someone fall in love with you. This doesn’t mean you have to give to them constantly to make them fall in love with you. It just means that you show them that you have an altruistic attitude and the ability to act on that attitude when necessary.
2. Ask The Right Questions
Want to create a conversation that will help them see how great you are? Ask the right questions. Ask the questions that inspire excitement and passion in them, and then create a conversation around those things that make them see you as someone they have connected with and will be able to connect with for a long time to come.
Not sure what to ask? A study done by Arthur Aron found that 36 questions can cause two strangers to fall in love. You can find those questions at https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/open-gently/201310/36-questions-bring-you-closer-together.
3. Look Into Each Other’s Eyes
That same study found that staring into each other’s eyes had a big impact on making someone fall in love with you. I have heard variations of how long to do this, but 10 minutes seems to be the point where an altered state of consciousness is reported and creates a special type of intimacy, especially when combined with the previous questions.
4. Make Someone Feel Comfortable Enough To Be Vulnerable
When someone feels vulnerable around you (not because of you), you have a chance at winning them over. Perhaps this is why men often take their date to a scary movie. It puts their date in a vulnerable state where they need their date to protect them – or at least that is the stereotype. In any case, if you can get someone to depend on you or require your support or care, you will deepen the bond between the two of you and have a chance of making them fall in love with you.
5. Mirror The Person You Are Interested In
Mirroring is the process of copying someone else’s gestures, attitudes, or speech, and it often happens in the company of people you love. For instance, my friend was born in Newfoundland but lived out of that province for most of her life. Every time she went to visit, she adopted their accent before landing and kept it until she got back home. It was a way to mirror her family and fit in – and it worked. But, even better, her part-time accent ended up attracting a particular man from Newfoundland to her, and they fell in love and got married quickly. You can use this simple technique to fit in with the person you want to love you and develop a closeness from your similarities.
6. Cure Their Loneliness
One of the biggest factors in why people want someone to love is to cure their loneliness. If you find someone, they may be happy on their own, but they may also be lonely in some respects. If you can cure their loneliness, then you have a shot of making them view you as someone they want to keep around.
For instance, be available to them during the times that they would be most lonely, such as holidays, birthdays, or dates that remind them of something sad. In addition, if they call and say they are feeling lonely, take action to make them feel really good. Cure their loneliness and replace it with something fun and exciting, such as a proposed trip or a get-together that excites them.
7. Make Them Laugh
You will find that making people laugh is recommended to develop all relationships in life, and this is because it has the power to promote a feeling of fondness and deep affection. Laughter also releases feel-good chemicals, such as endorphins, and reduces stress hormones, such as cortisol.
In other words, laughter makes someone feel really, really good, no matter what type of situation or problem they are having. If you have the power to lift someone’s mood and make them feel good, then you have the power to make them fall in love with you.
8. Work On Your Appearance
Most people admit that they could easily fall in love with someone who is conventionally attractive, but the truth is that you don’t have to be conventionally attractive in order to win someone over. You have no control over certain elements of your appearance, but you do have control over others.
For instance, you can cut your hair, wear different clothes, and change the shape of your body. While these are all superficial things, they can play a part in how someone feels about you. The simple act of working on yourself physically can draw someone in and attract them to you despite certain traits that are out of your control.
9. Be Clear About Your Feelings
Sometimes the person you want to fall in love with you has no idea that you see them as more than a friend. If you are scared of rejection, then you probably haven’t given them any reason to see you as something more, so their mind is not focused on romantic feelings towards you. Making yourself clear can help them see you in a brand new light.
I have a friend who didn’t realize that a guy was interested in her. He was always at the same parties, but he didn’t actually show interest in her even though he was crazy about her. When he finally did, she realized that she was extremely attracted to him and fell in love with him instantly.
10. Back Away
Creating some distance is one of the ways to make someone fall in love with you when you have been too needy. When you are in someone’s face too much, it can be hard for them to get the space they need to assess your positive qualities that they find attractive. Backing away gives them some breathing space and allows them to stop focusing on your neediness and, instead, focus on what you can offer them.
The trick is to not give enough space that they forget about you and move on, but give them enough space that they miss you and want to see you again. This could just be a couple of days of being apart or it could be a few weeks.
To start, trying reducing the amount of time you talk and see them. You don’t have to cut off all contact. In fact, you shouldn’t because that would get weird. Just get a little busier with your life. If you notice more of an urge to see you on their part, then you have found the sweet spot for creating a longing. If not, then get a little bit busier and see if that works.
11. Become A Part Of Their Routine
We tend to be fond of the things that are in our routine; in fact, they become somewhat of a necessity in our lives and we feel weird when we lose a part of our routine. We easily stick to our routine every day. It doesn’t cause us any stress or resistance. And it doesn’t drain our energy but, instead, replenishes it. That sounds like a perfect recipe for love to me! If you can become a part of someone’s routine, then you can become a necessary part of their life.
Start off by having a few regular times that you get together for something like coffee or pizza. Then, sneak your way into their routine even more by adding something on Saturday night or Sunday afternoon. Soon, they won’t be able to live without you in their weekly life, which can lead to their daily life.
12. Increase Your Energy
If you want to draw love to you, then you have to get on the same energy level of love. This is not some hokey stuff, this is actual science. When you are living in a place of love or above, your energy level actually sends a higher output than if you feel anger or even neutrality.
Above love is joy, peace, and enlightenment, so aim to reach those things in your life. You will find that you will instantly become more attractive to everyone around you, and your chances of making someone fall in love with you simply because of this alone is pretty high.
13. Be Sexual
Don’t be scared to be a sexual being. If you are human, then you have sexuality floating around inside of you. Show it off. Let other people see that you are a sensual person who would be exciting to be around, especially in a relationship with. Think Don Juan or Marilyn Monroe and then go with it.
When we fall in love with someone for life, there has to be a sensual connection there. It is important to feel aroused in a way that keeps affection high. If you are not in touch with that side of yourself right now, get out and take classes that help you tap into it, such as sensual dance classes or even pole dancing!
14. Make Every Day Count
This life can be pretty boring when you are with someone boring, but when you are with someone adventurous, every day is worth living. It’s hard not to fall in love with someone who has the attitude that they should make every day count. It’s hard not to get swept up in their passion and live by their rules.
Therefore, get passionate about your life and make every day worth living. If you are someone who makes every day count, despite what is happening, then you are someone who can easily make someone fall in love with you.
15. Be More Confident
Confidence will help you do everything above and more. It will help you become the person you want to be and become happy with yourself, and when you are happy with yourself, other people will be happy with you too.
Confidence is sexy. Confidence is admirable. Confidence is a quality that makes you look like you will be able to get through tough times and make everything OK. In short, developing confidence is one of the top ways to make someone fall in love with you.