Go forth and cuddle
Cuddling is a universal way of showing affection. It doesn’t matter if it is a person, animal, or an object like a teddy bear or blanket, cuddling is definitely the best way to say I care about you, I want to be close to you, and I accept you in my space. We cuddle into our friends when we are happy and celebrating. We cuddle with our partners when we are in love. We cuddle our family members when we need comfort or are going through tough times. And we will take a cuddle from any person or animal when we are feeling down. Cuddling is absolutely the best way to feel better, and we all crave a good cuddle now and then. Following are some cuddle facts to increase your cuddling knowledge.
1. There Is No Right Length Of Time To Get The Benefits
Cuddling for a few minutes can be just as satisfying as cuddling for hours on a lazy Sunday. You don’t need to make cuddling a strict procedure that has to be done at a certain time in a certain way on a certain day. Cuddle when you feel like it, and you will still get all of the benefits that we know about cuddling.
However, that said, if you don’t cuddle at all, then you are not going to get the benefits, and you don’t want to miss out on the benefits. The proven benefits of cuddling include more overall happiness in life, reduced stress, lower blood pressure, improved sleep, strengthened immune system, and a relief from pain, to name just a few. Therefore, if you do not have a person to cuddle in your life, make sure you find some time to cuddle an animal whenever you can. The benefits are still there!
As an extra note, it seems that animals need to be cuddled too. They do it with their mother, their siblings, and with their owners if they let them. Without the close contact, they can get depressed and feel stressed out. So, while there is no length of time to cuddle your pet for the benefits either, please make sure you at least take some time to do it!
2. Cuddling Your Partner Can Help Improve Your Sex Life
If you are not in the mood for sex, and you haven’t been in the mood for a while, try some sensual cuddling. When you cuddle, dopamine is released, and that is a hormone that can help increase sexual desire. And, when you add the element of physical touch felt from head to toe, in an embrace that feels an awful lot like being sexual, it can increase the desire to have sex in both of you. That desire can lead to the act of sex, or at the very least, the desire to have sex sometime soon.
You don’t have to face each other to get the benefits of cuddling for an improved sex life. Get into a spoon position and let your bodies’ line up perfectly as they are totally capable of doing. You can also face each other and wrap your legs around each other like you used to do when you were making out. Instead of kissing, though, enjoy the sensation of your partner’s breath on your head, chest, or face. Let yourself be mindful and present with your partner and enjoy the feeling of being close to them, without thoughts, judgments, anger, or other negative emotions. You may find your bodies rocking in an intimate rhythm that is extremely arousing.
3. Cuddling With Your Ex Won’t Solve Things
As powerful as cuddling is for two people in love, it doesn’t seem to be as powerful for people who have fallen out of love. Even though cuddling does release hormones that make you feel good and increase your sexual desire, it’s not going to be a magic tool to win back your ex if those lovey-dovey feelings aren’t there anymore.
There is a great video from BuzzFeed where exes cuddle again for the first time in years. In the video, you can tell that they are feeling awkward about the situation and are kind of annoyed with each other. In the end, it’s obvious that the cuddle session was more awkward and annoying than it was something that was drawing them back together.
I was listening to a professional cuddler talk – one of those people that you can cuddle at a cuddle cafe (see below), and she said that a good cuddler is one that is full of unconditional love and shows affection to human beings. Perhaps this is why cuddling with your ex is such a bad idea! You don’t feel the unconditional love; instead, you feel all the tension from the things that went wrong. And you don’t feel like showing them affection, especially if they hurt you in some way.
4. Some People Don’t Like Cuddling And Some People Even Dread It
Even though we know that all babies enjoy being cuddled by their mothers and other people, as it helps in the bonding process and makes them feel safe, not all adults seem to like cuddling. Some people find it too hot. Some people find it annoying and a disruption of their space. Some people find it too much of an emotional connection. And some people find it downright terrifying.
For example, some people have a fear of touching or being touched, called Haphephobia. The chances of being in a relationship with someone who has this fear is slim since they would not like to have you in their space at all, and usually the fear includes the fear of sexual assault.
While I can’t find an actual name for the fear of cuddling, I have found people online who talk about their fear of cuddling. Some people have mentioned their inability to breathe while being cuddled while others have mentioned their intense desire get away from the cuddling altogether.
So, if someone you want to cuddle doesn’t want to cuddle you back, don’t take offense. It just may not be their thing.
5. If You Are Struggling With The Fear Of Death, Cuddling Could Help
Not all phobias are made worse by cuddling. In fact, a series of studies published in Psychological Science found that touching an inanimate object can have a huge influence over existential fears, such as fear of death. This includes cuddling a teddy bear. The researchers believed that touch in this way could help to treat low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety.
Perhaps this is why we grab onto something when we are scared. It doesn’t matter if it is a person, animal, or a tree, we tend to reach out and hold onto something until the fear goes away. We seem to need the comfort of something else to help us get out of our mind and feel better.
6. There Are Many Different Ways To Cuddle
Of course, there is the big and little spoon, where one person comes in behind the other, and they both tuck their knees up and line up perfectly together. But, there are many other ways to cuddle as well.
Forking: This is done facing towards each other and requires you to interlock your legs together.
Side-by-side: This is a cuddle done by laying on your backs and possibly holding hands or leaning into each other slightly. The point is that you are close and cuddled.
Hug laying down: This is when you embrace as if you were hugging, only you are horizontal in bed.
Sitting: You don’t have to be in bed to cuddle. This is probably most popular with younger people who sit on their partner’s lap or in between their legs and then embrace.
Over the back: This is when one person is laying down on their stomach, and the other person lays almost on top of them and puts their arm around them.
This is just a short list of cuddling methods. There are so many different ways to cuddle that you can probably invent some of your own cuddling terms and teach others how to do them!
7. Cuddling Helps Build Intimacy
Cuddling has been shown to increase intimacy between two people. When you are able to build intimacy with anyone, you, in turn, build trust. Since trust is one of the biggest factors of a healthy relationship, you are essentially improving your relationships by cuddling.
It’s hard to not feel something special about someone you just cuddled. In fact, one study that was published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that all 397 couple in a study who were in committed relationships found that physical content, even without the sex, positively affected the relationship. Other studies have found that cuddling after being intimate can help boost relationships success.
However, cuddling doesn’t just build a bond with humans. It also builds a bond with animals. We all know the bond we feel with our favorite cuddly dog or cat, but it goes well beyond those two as you can find people who cuddle their birds, reptiles and more exotic pets with love and compassion.
In fact, there is a video going around right now of a man from Thailand and a baby elephant cuddling. The elephant obviously wants to cuddle and walks around the man pushing his head against his, and finally initiates the sweetest cuddling session you’ve ever seen. The elephant eventually closes its eyes and enjoys the pets and cuddles that the man gives it. It is obvious that the man is earning the baby elephant’s trust as he cuddles it.
8. There Such A Thing As A Cuddle Convention
In Portland, on Valentine’s Day of 2015, the first ever Cuddle Convention was held, and as the name would imply it was all about the act of cuddling! It was an intimate scene without the sexual tone that normally comes from cuddling.
I think this is a good thing to point out to any friends who feel that cuddling non-family humans of the sex you are attracted to always leads to sexual intimacy. This is clearly not the case, and the pictures from the first ever cuddling convention are proof of that! The Cuddle Convention of 2016 is still to be announced, so if you want a good cuddle, you may want to keep your eyes open for it.
9. There Are Human, Dog, And Cat Cuddling Cafes
The benefits of cuddling are well known, but even if they weren’t there is a need that is built in most people to experience human affection such as cuddling. In fact, the need for cuddling is so high that people are actually running businesses off the demand.
People who don’t have other people to cuddle, and want to feel the human contact that we all crave and the benefits of cuddling, can head to different places around the world for an actual cuddle session with someone who gives you a compassionate and sincere session of cuddling.
It costs money, but a cuddle with a ‘professional cuddler’ can help improve your emotional well-being and your physical well-being, so it is well worth it if you find the right person to cuddle with. These are, as far as I’ve found, completely clothed cuddle sessions where you can spend just a few minutes cuddling or hours cuddling at any time you want.
What is like? Some people in one video tried cuddling with professional cuddlers, and while they were hesitant a little at first, they found it extremely nice and comforting in the end. Some liked the cuddling, some like the caressing (non-sexual caressing), and some liked the conversation, but none of them thought it was a horrible experience that they would never do again. You can watch the video on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SO2-tMzG43Y. And why wouldn’t they enjoy it? Cuddling is one of the most basic ways to feel valued, loved, and accepted.
How much would a cuddle session cost? One cuddle cafe in Portland, Oregon, called Cuddle Up To Me, charges $1 a minute for whatever kind of cuddle you are looking for. You don’t have to just cuddle. You can play games or dance or do whatever you want to feel as though someone is giving you the attention you crave.
There are also animal cuddling cafes that cater to people who just want to cuddle animals, which, let’s face it, are a joy to cuddle. Their unconditional and non-judgmental cuddles are the perfect thing to help you relax, laugh, and boost your mood. There are cafes in Canada, Europe, and Japan that I know of.