Do you really understand yourself?
It’s important to learn how to get to know yourself. Great things are going to happen if you do! Doors will open up, happiness will increase, and you will start living according to your own desires in life, which will feel amazing. You won’t feel like you are living someone else’s life or in someone else’s shadow. You won’t feel uncertain about what you want to do next. You will understand who you are and make choices based on that understanding. And, you will be able to say no to people when you need to.
One of the most rewarding things about knowing yourself is that you can hold your head up high and be confident telling other people who you are. That confidence will feel amazing, and people will respect you for it.
Not sure where to start? Following are some important ways on how to get to know yourself starting today.
Declare You Are Going To Acknowledge Yourself Starting Today
You have to stop focusing on what other people want in order to get to know yourself better. With all of their words, ideas, requests, demands and opinions floating around in your head, it can be hard to listen to yourself! The best way to do this is to practice the affirmation ‘I acknowledge myself always’. This affirmation will remind you that you want to be yourself and celebrate the real you. Trust me, the more you say it to yourself, the more you want to get to know yourself.
For years, I let my friends and family dictate who I was because I wasn’t paying attention to what I really wanted or how I really felt. I was too busy trying to impress them and stay on their good side. One day I was watching a show on TV about acknowledging yourself and admitting that you were the most important person in your life. It was a message I had heard before, but for some reason, it resonated with me that day. Probably because I was tired of hiding my true self and felt an inner need to express my true likes, beliefs, and opinions. From that day forward, I started to really get to know myself.
If you are reading an article on how to get to know yourself, then I think you are probably also tired of hiding your true self. You feel the need to be who you are and who you were meant to be, and that inner voice has gotten too loud to ignore. So don’t! Make a commitment to acknowledge yourself first, and listen to what resonates with you as the truth, rather than listening to other people.
One important thing to consider is that you are unique. You are not like everyone else, and no one else can read your mind, so you have to turn inwards in order to discover who you really are. There is no other way to find out.
Start Paying Attention To Your Emotions
Your emotions are your most important guide towards getting to know yourself. When you feel bad, depressed, tired, unmotivated, ticked off, or any other negative emotion, something is wrong. Something you are doing, saying, or thinking is not working for you, and it’s important to admit that so you can find out what it is.
On the other hand, if you are feeling good, energetic, happy, positive, or any other positive emotion, then you are doing, saying, or thinking something in line with who you are.
For example, if you are watching a horror movie, and you feel sick to your stomach and want to get out, then you may be someone who does not like horror movies. A friend of mine used to go to horror movies because he thought it was the cool thing to do, but they literally depressed the heck out of him, and he finally had to admit that they affected him negatively. Once he stopped trying to be cool, he was able to ditch those movies from his life, and he felt much better about himself. His friends made fun of him, but he didn’t care. His happiness was more important than their expectations.
Some optimal times to pay attention to your emotions are:
– Before, during, and after work. If you dread going into work, can barely make it through the day, and feel most alive when you leave work, then you don’t like your job very much!
– When you are spending time with a friend. If they bring you down, then they may not be giving you something that you need, and you need to pay attention to that.
– With you are with your partner. Again, if you don’t feel good around them, then something is wrong, and it is important to figure out what that is so you can start feeling good!
– When you are eating. It’s so important to pay attention to how you feel when you eat certain foods, and then admit what you actually enjoy and what you simply eat out of habit. Not everyone thrives on the same diet or benefits from the same foods. When you can pinpoint what foods make you feel amazing, and start focusing on making those foods a part of your daily diet, you will feel amazing. The bad and good news: Usually these foods are healthy and they make you feel alive and energetic.
Once you start admitting things to yourself in regards to the above aspects of your life, you will start paying attention to how you feel in many areas of your life. You will be amazed at how much you learn about yourself when you simply focus on how you feel.
One HUGE thing to note is that fear is a good emotion to have. While it may seem negative, fear often occurs when you are about to face something that could be life-changing for you. Common sense goes a long way here. If you are about to walk on thin ice, then your fear may be telling you that you shouldn’t do it. But, if you are about to apply for a dream job, then fear is simply your limiting beliefs trying to talk you out of stepping out of your comfort zone.
Create Your Private Autobiography
Writing out an autobiography is a way to tell the story of your life to anyone you want to read it, including you. If you write down your daily thoughts, disappointments, and achievements, you will not only be writing down what is happening, you will be reading what is happening.
This may seem time-consuming, but it becomes addicting and an important part of your time. Journaling allows you to get things out, think things through, reflect on how you felt, and determine how you really feel. That makes it one of the best ways on how to get to know yourself.
One of the great things about a journal is that you can easily see where you are stuck. For instance, if you write for 6 months in your journal and reread what you wrote 6 months ago and find that you are still complaining about the same thing, then you get insight into what your weaknesses are and what you need to work on. Or, you can clearly see that 6 months ago you were happy, and now you are not happy, and then discover what has changed to make you feel so different.
In short, if you want to get to know yourself, you have to journal. You won’t remember everything about your life – all those little details that help you get to know yourself – unless you write it down and have it somewhere for you to reference.
Listen To Other People
This is a hard one to do because when other people tell us who they think we are, it’s hard not to get defensive! But, when it comes to how to get to know yourself, listening to them can be really important.
Other people often have a sense of who you are because they observe you. They can see those little facial expressions that say more than words. They see your strengths and weaknesses more clearly than they see their own sometimes.
Usually other people tell you who you are in the form of criticism. Their criticism may have some partial truths in it, and it’s important to take what applies to you and discard the rest. If you are getting to know yourself, then you may not be able to see some things about yourself that are clear to other people.
Don’t let other people beat you down, though. Some things you know about yourself with certainty, and their opinions reflect nothing but their own fears or judgments. But, don’t deny a truth when you hear it. Listen to their words, consider them, and then decide for yourself whether or not they are true.
For instance, I was once told I worry too much. It hit me like a knife to the heart. I didn’t want to think that I was someone who worried. I wanted to believe that I was someone who had it all together and was cool, not stressed out. So I got ticked off. I resented them for saying it. I complained about their judgment. And, then, as I was falling asleep that night worrying about something, I realized that they were right. Admitting it helped me get to know myself better and dig into why I worried so much. If they hadn’t of told me, and I hadn’t admitted it as a truth, I would still be stuck worrying too much.
A lot of what we ‘know about ourselves’ stems from our childhood. Or, more specifically, from the people we spend most of our time with growing up. For instance, I have a friend who believed she hated Indian food because her father hated Indian food. But, when she met a guy who loved Indian food, she gave it a shot, and it turned out to be her favorite food! Who knew?
It’s important not to hold on too tightly to your beliefs. Sometimes they may not actually be applicable to you, but just feel like they should be applicable to you because you’ve been taught they should.
How do you know you are close-minded?
– You say you ‘hate’ something even though you have never tried it.
– You are not willing to give other people a chance to express their beliefs.
– You argue with everyone to prove that they are wrong and you are right.
– You make general statements. (All men are jerks or French people are arrogant.)
– You feel the need to judge everyone and everything.
– You will not accept new ideas into your life, even when you have facts to back up their validity.
– You instantly dislike people who don’t agree with you.
If you are not open-minded, then you can’t discover new truths about yourself. You can’t let in new ways of thinking or viewing the world. You can’t open up to new interests or beneficial things for your life. You can’t admit that you are spewing off things that you have been taught, but not necessarily resonate with.
Get Out And Experience Life
If you want to get to know yourself, get out there and experience life. The more experiences you have, the more you will learn about yourself, and the more confident you will be in yourself. You literally cannot know things about yourself unless you try them.
For example, one woman I knew was sick of dating losers. She had never been single. She had always just accepted the next guy that came into her life, and she was always disappointed in the end. She has no regulations for what type of guy she wanted because she didn’t know herself enough to figure out what kind of guy would fit her life. So, she gave up on dating and started focusing on her life. Being by herself, and doing things on her own terms, gave her insight into who she was and what kind of life she wanted to live. That gave her insight into who would be a good match for her. Soon, she knew what kind of man would fit her life, and she kept her eyes open for him. The next man she dated was a perfect fit and she ended up marrying him!
If you stop trying to force life to happen and start experiencing it, you will start to learn what you want and don’t want. This requires living in the moment, enjoying life as it is, admitting what works and what doesn’t work for you, and then tweaking your life to match your needs.