In order to forgive yourself and move on there are a few things that you need to recognize. When you acknowledge that there are certain reasons why you do things that require forgiveness, you will have a much easier time forgiving yourself and moving on. Following are some simple truths to keep in mind.
Life Isn’t Always Perfect
Despite your best intentions, life does not always work out the way you thought it would. Mistakes are made. Failures happen. And you can do things that you normally wouldn’t do in times of stress, anger, hurt, and pain. Recognizing that what you did was done at a time where life wasn’t perfect, and reminding yourself that it happens, can help you forgive yourself and move on.
You Are A Human With Emotions
Emotions play a huge part in our behavior. For instance, if you are feeling sad, you may be more inclined to treat someone you love without a lot of kindness. But, emotions are something that everyone deals with. We all get angry, hurt, sad, and overwhelmed at times.
Even the Dalai Lama, an advocate for compassion, has admitted that he gets angry and outraged sometimes. In fact, he has said that if someone never shows anger, then something is likely wrong with them mentally. Knowing that the Dalai Lama even has emotions that likely requires him to forgive himself should help you do the same and move on.
You Can Only Do So Much With The Time You Have
Often we hold on to what didn’t get done. For instance, we didn’t help someone when they needed it, or we didn’t give ourselves some time to relax, or we didn’t finish a project that we wanted to finish. All of these things can cause us to hold on to upset feelings, but it’s important to recognize that we used our time as wisely as we knew how.
There is sometimes a lot of pressure to get certain things done, and other things get put on the back burner. It is only with hindsight that we start to regret not doing them, and that’s when forgiveness has to come in.
Instead of holding on to anger or pain around something you didn’t get done, forgive yourself and move on by scheduling it into your life if it is something that can still be done. Make it a priority. Make doing something towards it a part of your daily routine.
And, if it is not something that you can still tackle, such as saying I love you to someone who has passed on, remind yourself that you didn’t realize the impact it would have at the time and that it is out of your ability to change now. In short, don’t dwell on what you didn’t do, focus on what you can do now.
Your Mistakes Do Not Define You
Often we hold on to something because we feel like a mistake we have made has determined who we are. For instance, we feel like others view us in a negative light because of what we did, so we feel like we have to beat ourselves up for doing something like that in the first place!
But, the truth is that your mistakes here and there do not define you. The way you treat people and the compassion, kindness, and love you give out to the world is what really defines you. So, remember who you are as a whole person and forgive those little moments in life that are only a small moment in your entire lifespan.