“Just be honest with yourself. You’re a loser!” Have you ever said something like that in the mirror? I know I have! But, that kind of ‘honesty’ is actually just a bunch of crap. Being honest with yourself means looking past the limiting beliefs, such as how much of a loser you think you are, and looking into your true self and what you are capable or not capable of doing.
The power of being honest with yourself is incredible. It will change your life in every way for the better. It will impact your financial situation. It will impact your relationships. It will impact your happiness. It will even impact your sleep and overall health.
In short, being honest with yourself can help you become the person you want to be. So, let’s dig in and get detailed about this.
6 Ways Being Honest With Yourself Will Impact Your Life Positively
1. You Can See When You Are Acting From Emotion
When you act out of anger, you become a jerk. Most people, however, don’t see that they are a jerk. They think that their anger was created by someone who cut them off, flipped them off, or told them off. The truth is that all emotions come from within you. Nobody else makes you angry. You get to choose which reaction you have. Being honest with yourself helps you see that, and you drastically change the way you react to situations.
Eckhart Tolle talks about emotional patterns that repeat themselves over and over again as the pain body. When you are honest with yourself, and recognize that you are getting angry too much or being too mean or reacting poorly in some other way, then you can start to recognize the pain body. The only way to minimize the pain body it is to be honest with yourself and recognize it as an emotion you have, not an emotion that someone else caused.
2. You Can Decide What You Really Want To Do
When you are honest with yourself, you can admit whether or not you are doing something you love or you are doing something for another reason, such as obligation. This is hard because being honest often means that it’s time you have to start doing something else. You have to start taking action on something more or something better. You have to give up the comfortable routine (even if you hate it) and find and follow your passion. That’s a lot of work, but it’s also really rewarding!
3. You Can Get Out Of Harmful Relationships
When you get honest with yourself, you can clearly see which relationships are hurting you and which are helping you. Fortunately, the recognition of how much unhealthy relationships are hurting you is often enough to get you to take action and get out. But, if you are not honest with yourself, then you will justify the relationship. You will find ways to excuse the other person’s behavior and pull down the blinds on what is really going on. You will lie to yourself and say things like “You’re strong because you are staying in this relationship!” when in reality, strength comes from demanding more for yourself.
4. You Can See The Power You Have Inside Of You
When you shove limiting beliefs to the side and start to get honest with yourself and your capabilities, you will see some immense power inside of you. You will see the strength that you admire in other people and the honesty that you admire in other people. All those traits that make people look powerful and happy will be found inside of you, and you will be able to build upon and strengthen those strengths because you will suddenly have faith that you are capable of doing so.
5. You Can Admit You Did The Best With What You Had
When you are honest with yourself, you will look back and see that everything you did was to the best of your ability. You were working with what you had, and even if that wasn’t much, you couldn’t have done any better than you did. Being honest with yourself opens up a new level of awareness. It’s like unlocking a new level of the video game of life, and you become acutely aware of where you went wrong, but also why there was nowhere else for you to go at the time.
6. You Start To Admit What Is Healthy And Not Healthy
Honesty means shining a light on your healthy habits and unhealthy habits, and being reminded of which ones they are each time you engage in them.
For instance, when you are honest about your addiction, you can see that it’s unhealthy. After that, every time you partake in it, you will remind yourself of why it is unhealthy and why you shouldn’t be doing it. This can cause a lot of stress on the mind and body, but it can also inspire you to change.
All 6 of these things will help you be happier and healthier. That is really the bottom line when it comes to being honest with yourself. I have a friend who was depressed for many years and didn’t let any of us know it. She lied to us by pretending she was OK, but most of all she lied to herself. That depression could have been resolved if she had been honest and started seeking the help that she needed, but instead she suffered for years with an unhealthy relationship, regrets, unhappiness, a sense of weakness, and the inability to see what she really wanted. Being honest with herself freed her from all that negativity.
What Will Happen If You Are Not Honest With Yourself?
There are two scenarios. The first one is that nothing will happen. You will go through life lying to yourself and die without reaching your full potential, but you will not know it because you’ve spent your life lying to yourself.
The second one is that one day you will wake up and feel incredible anxiety and regret. You will realize that you have not achieved anything you really wanted in life. You will find yourself stuck in relationships that are not good for you. You will look back at all the wasted time and clearly see how lying to yourself impacted your life.
How To Get Honest With Yourself: 5 Daily Practices
If you don’t want to waste any more time, then it’s time to discover who you are and what your life purpose is really about. Take some time out of each day to practice the following 5 things. If you do, you will find yourself becoming more and more honest with yourself.
1. Listen To Your Inner Self
You may be a very skilled liar. You may have been lying to yourself for so long that you can barely even recognize the truth when it slaps you in the face. But, you still know the truth inside of you.
Your inner self is acutely aware of when you are lying to yourself and when you are not. But, you need to consciously become aware that you are lying to yourself. Just like you do when you want to bust other people lying to you, it’s important to recognize the signs of lying. To see those, you have to look inside of your beliefs.
Your beliefs dictate whether you will lie to yourself for not. Sometimes they help you justify certain things, but sometimes you adopt unhealthy beliefs from other people and feel that they are very true. You may hear about a study that was done or a story that was published and use that to justify a belief that motivates you to lie to yourself.
For instance, if you are a smoker, then you may have heard about Tim who lived to be 105 while smoking a pack of cigarettes every day. Hearing that can give you the belief that smoking isn’t really that bad. I mean, if Tim can live to 105 smoking a ton, why can’t you? Then, you start to lie to yourself every time you take a drag of your cigarette instead of believing the truth that is clearly written out on the package and been proven in millions of people – smoking is killing you.
If you find yourself rationalizing something that isn’t rational, then it should be clear that you are lying to yourself. You are trying to minimize what you know to be true by covering it up. Once you see that, you will have to get honest with the truth.
In addition, if you are asking other people to be honest, then that’s also a sign that you are not being honest with yourself. Your subconscious is literally screaming at you to find the truth, so you look outwards and try to get people to tell you it.
For instance, if you have to say, “Be honest, am I doing something bad?” then you need to recognize that you really believe it’s bad at the core. You should be asking the question in the mirror and listening to your inner self, not other people.
2. Develop Your Conscience
Your conscience is what tells you what is wrong or right in life, especially your own. The more you use it, the more you develop it. This doesn’t mean that someone who is 60 has a stronger conscience than someone who is 20. Someone who is 60 may have let other people do all of their thinking for them, which has kept their conscience in whatever state other people dictated. So, no matter what your age is, you can work on developing it and making it stronger.
When you conscience becomes stronger, being honest with yourself becomes easier. You can clearly see what is right and what is wrong, and you can’t justify things to yourself as much. And even if you do, you will feel the weight of the lie inside of you.
Get more in tune with your gut to develop your conscience. When you feel heavy and possibly even a little sick, then something isn’t right. When you feel light and energetic, then you know you are being true to yourself.
Picture a man giving a presentation on a product that could hurt millions of people. He knows it’s not right, but his desire to get paid is overpowering that honestly. After talking for a few minutes, he feels sick enough that he knows what he’s doing is wrong. He can’t handle the heaviness and the sickly feeling anymore so he bows out of the presentation and destroys the product. He finally listened to his conscience and became honest with himself about what he was doing.
3. Practice Self-Love
You will often find that lying is something you don’t respect in other people. When you are lied to by a friend, for instance, you can easily end the relationship and find someone more trustworthy. You want people who are on your side in life and willing to love you enough to be honest with you so that you can make good decisions and know the truth about them and your relationship.
If you love yourself, you will start being honest with yourself. Your relationship with yourself is going to be the strongest relationship you will ever have. It doesn’t matter where you go, you will still be there. So practice some self-love and catch yourself in your lies.
4. Ask Yourself This Question In All Interactions
Are you copying other people’s lives or are you living your own?
To answer that, decide if you are really showing people who you truly are, what you truly love, and what your passion is, or if you are trying to fit in, win some sort of popularity contest, and please other people.
If you decide you are not being your authentic self, ask why. Are you scared of people judging you? Are you scared of failing? Are you scared that you are not good enough? All of your answers will allow you a little more insight into yourself, which will help you be more honest with yourself.
5. Decide If Life Is Getting Better Or Worse
If you are being honest with yourself, then life is going to feel pretty good, and it will continue to get better as your honesty helps you get the life you really want. If you are not being honest with yourself, then life is getting worse. You are experiencing more stress and feeling more drained by the day.
If your life is not getting better, sit down and decide what’s wrong. Is it your relationships, physical health, mental health, or career? Do you feel like you are wasting too much time on useless stuff and never getting anything important done? These questions will give you a lot of insight into yourself, so really take the time to decide where things are going wrong and what you can do about it.